Perfection itself is imperfection

In the end, God sees us and ultimately judges us on what and who we were while on earth…

Hey friends, guess what? I learned something new today for the millionth time in my life. I am a human being and I make mistakes. Usually I will make fun of myself and fix them when I can but I don’t always have time in the show to do that so I move on and focus on what is next.

I feel special to know some people who are perfect. I am not one of those. Because I know we all enjoy being criticized, someone has to give people the outlet, right? I’m also not a perfect mother, wife, daughter, sister, Aunt, or grand-daughter.  I am me.  Just me.  And I promise you I criticize myself harder than any other person on this planet.  

I come in to work every day with the expectation to be as good as I can.  To know every script inside and out, and to know the scripts if for some reason the prompter and my computer both go out during the show that I can wing it to tell a story.  Sometimes I succeed and sometimes I fail.

My job means the world to me.  I am passionate sometimes to a fault.  I love Lubbock, the South Plains, and the Great State of Texas.  I love the people here and how they come together to help others.  But I look in the mirror most days and not like the reflection I see back.  I look at my husband while he sleeps and feel awful that I don’t see him enough.  When I get home at night, I check in on each child and whisper how much I love them and go to bed with a lump in my throat and guilt in my heart because I’m not spending enough time with them.

So tonight I mispronounced the word “epitome” on air and rather than correct myself I just kept going.  I made a mistake.

I have a friend who used to work with me and she got a message from a viewer today who was absolutely horrid and mean.  Sometimes taking up for ourselves is shunned upon so we take the criticism and keep our mouths shut as heavy criticism comes with the territory of being a public figure.  We simply pray for the person who has brought us down to a lowest low and move on.  You will never make everyone happy.  I will never make everyone happy.  Believe me I’ve tried.  Not sure where people get the idea to tell us how much they hate what we are wearing, how your hair looks, the way your makeup looks and even down to the color of your lipstick.  And then there are days like today that you just explode.  Not at anyone.  Just at yourself for not being better.  For not being able to make everyone happy.

All I know is that I will leave my desk tonight and pray that tomorrow is better.  That when I come in, it will be with a positive attitude, and grace.  I have a family who loves me, children that still want to hug me, a husband that deals with this crazy life, and friends who listen to me.

Please think before you tell someone how awful they are.  Maybe today’s criticizers will have a better day tomorrow.  We can all hope anyway.


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